Building phase

The demo is done. The concrete has been washed and painted so no more mould will grow there - ever! (Apparently.) However, the paint was extra stinky and I'm surprised that none of us suffocated in the night. But the basement does look a lot better now! Spray foam insulation might happen on Friday, which would be lovely as the workers are, quite reasonably, taking the week off between Christmas and New Years...

Wet floors - but it's ok

Demo is done in the basement. How do I know? The big waste bin that has been parked in our driveway for the week has disappeared. So the demo must be done. Also, we have no more walls in the basement. It's weird to see it so unfinished. The contractor (or someone) power-washed the entire basement today, and the walls are dripping and the floor has puddles on it (small ones, but still). I guess it's ok - we are plugging in the dehumidifier overnight... Oh wait... that means we need a plug.... Hmm.....

Basement reno - update

Came home Tues and our downstairs bathroom was gone gone gone. Just a hole in the wall. Well, not even a wall really. The boys think this is amazing. They have plans to take out ALL of the walls and make the entire basement one big huge play space. This is not an entirely bad idea really - it would be a lot cheaper than what we actually do have planned...

Weds morning, however, we had no hot water and I loooove my hot showers in the morning - especially when the weather is cooler. So on top of a demo'd basement and various other (perceived) stresses in my life, I almost broke down and cried when I had to take a cold shower - and my feet didn't warm up for hours because it's cold in my office at work too...

Called the contractor 8am - he told us about how he found the water heater unplugged and thought we had done it yadda yadda yadda and so he plugged it back in and it should be fine, except it wasn't. So he said he'd pop by. Turns out that our house has the wrong coloured wires for the different lines (or whatever - he was speaking some sort of electrician dialect...) and so while he plugged our hot water heater into the standard system, our house apparently is not standard. Matches the occupants I guess...

Good news- hot water was back in the evening. YAY!

In other news, Kid#1 managed to lose another wire from his braces (I think we're up to 3 "emergency" ortho visits now - and the braces have only been on for about 2 months out of a total of 6...). Called the ortho, got the front desk person just before she closed, and we're heading in 8am tomorrow morning - because the office is closed down for two weeks starting 5pm Thurs. So bad news - Kid#1 is going to have to HUSTLE tomorrow morning.

Which means I should go to bed. Not that I need the sleep  myself necessarily, but I will need the willpower and stamina to keep nagging at the kid...

No wonder I nearly break down emotionally over a cold shower!

ACK - basement reno!!!

The demolition of our basement started today. The premise is that there is probably mould and almost definitely animals (mice) that we need to get rid of. However, we're also moving a few things around and so on... I'm sure it will be great when it's all finished. However...

- the entire basement is off-limits for the kids
- no visitors or entertaining for the duration (both good and bad)
- the front room of our house contains much of what was in the basement, and so is also off-limits
- we have lost our downstairs bathroom
- my "home office" is now in the upstairs living room
- I don't do well in chaos

My biggest fear? Of course that we all get horribly sick and wish we had the second toilet. Argh. And, of course, Kid#1 tells us today about a kid who puked in class. Hooray.

My anxiety is through the roof. At least that's still there! for now....

Perspective

I found out recently that the 16 yr old son of a former teaching colleague has disappeared in the small town where I used to teach. I found this out through Facebook, which seems to be the hub for a lot of the news I get. I dutifully re-posted the photo, and the hope that the boy would find his way back to his family, and then another Facebook friend posted and made the connection to the mother with whom I used to teach. And that's when my heart started breaking.

You hear about teenagers running away from home. You hear about kids who go missing. You hear about these things - and they always happen to someone else. You fear them, and then chastise yourself for buying into the media hype about every parent's nightmare. Yet this time, I can't get it out of my head - that this happened - is happening- to someone that I know, in a town where I lived.

The obligatory Facebook page has been set up, and over 1000 people "liked" it within 24 hours. Students skipped school to help in the search effort (as they should) and teenaged friends of the disappeared boy are writing poems and scribbling "hope" on their arms and posters, in the hopes that this boy will come home.

One person recently posted a poem indicating that this boy has written farewell notes to his friends before leaving (he apparently left home Sunday evening, and wasn't back by the time Monday morning came around - I can only imagine his parents' concern as they looked in on an empty bed...). It disturbs me greatly that his disappearance might have been planned, that he may have thought no one loved him or cared. His friends seem to be writing about how  much he is loved, which makes me wonder if he'd been depressed and felt isolated and lonely.

It makes me want to hug my own kids - which I have done. Perspective is a wonderful thing - I just wish I could get it more often without someone else's tragedy behind it.

http://www.680news.com/news/local/article/304999--ground-search-continues-for-missing-uxbridge-teen

ACK!

Yesterday I signed away our line of credit on a basement reno project. Hubby knows about it, and agreed, so we're at least on the up and up about it. Not like the shopping I did the other day, but I digress.

The impetus is environmental - we strongly suspect that various individuals in the house are suffering breathing problems, allergies, runny noses, etc, due to mould in the basement. There are elevated counts and the carpet is ancient. So the entire basement should be stripped back, cleaned, and rebuilt.

But hey - if we're going to strip it all back and clean and rebuild, why not remake it as well? So a wall is moving, a couple of other walls are going to be built, a shower will be installed - and all of this adds up to chaos and debt.

I'm very nervous... I think the 3 months of chaos is more nerve-wracking than the debt, to be honest. I can barely stand it when the dining room table doesn't get wiped down after dinner.

I'm doomed, aren't I?

Another day...

Another fight about stuff. Me. Hubby. The boys. We sure know how to ruin a nice sunny November Sunday. Of course the fact that we spent 2 hours in the car doesn't help - and that I feel like I haven't had a break in several months. And that my basement is still mostly in boxes. And... and ... and...

Well let's just say, for the record, that I was right on all accounts and people in my family should just learn that sooner rather than later and we'd all get along just fine.

Hallowe'en

Kid#1 went as a lawyer - telling people that he'd sue them if they didn't fork over the candy. Wisely, everyone did. People generally agreed that he had the scariest costume.

Kid#2 resurrected a costume from 2 yrs ago, when he went as a snail. The costume is quite ingenious (and I say that even though I had nothing to do with it). It is decorated foam that covers a backpack, and the candy goes into the backpack through a flap in the top of the shell. It was Kid#2's idea, but Kid#1 and hubby built it.

Kid#2 got a lot of "wow" and "that's so cool" and other positive attention. Kid#1 did not.

Kid#1 sulked and said he hated Hallowe'en.

Sigh.

Hallowe'en is not my favourite occasion either. I remember as a kid having a perfectionistic bent around costumes - wanting the best one, wanting to be clever and original, wanting a great creative amazing something that everyone would adore and I'd shine. I never got it. One year, I went as a robot that I made out of cardboard boxes. Problem - we lived in the country and had to drive to each house. I had forgotten to engineer getting in and out of cars in my costume design. Another year, I went as a crash test dummy - it was clever except that I looked nothing like a crash test dummy. I worked from memory instead of research and no one got it.

So I completely empathize with Kid#1's bummed-outedness.

However, I reminded him of two things:

1. he had actually created the snail costume - so every time someone said that it was a great costume, he should take pride in that because even though Kid#2 was wearing it, Kid#1 was the actual creator.

2. going out for candy was totally optional and he could walk home by himself at any time.

We ended up staying out for an hour and a half and the lawyer's satchel was full to bursting when we got home. Kid#1 has plans for next year's costume already.

Clearly, you can't keep a good lawyer down.

Whatever... as if

I had something brilliant I was going to write here, but can't remember so whatever...

Saturday was my birthday party. If you've seen the pictures on Facebook,you know there was an embarrassment of candles (that's my new collective noun for birthday candles) and a wonderful gathering of supportive friends. I would love to do that more often - minus the candles.

Sunday Hubby took the kids out for a multi-km hike in the woods. I stayed at home and cooked and worked. Sometimes, I just like being alone. That's harder and harder to do with my day job. I miss my own time. Sometimes, I fantasize about taking a day off - just because. I might still do it.

Today is Monday which is "meh Monday". Hubby works late and I'm in charge of the kids. We have no activities beyond doing homework and piano practice. Downside: when I picked the kids up from the after-school program today, another mom was "not feeling very well". RED ALERT! Stay away...

We'll see what the rest of the week brings. And maybe I'll remember that brilliant thing I was going to write about...

Happy birthday to me

Today is my birthday. I have attained the age of the answer to life, the universe and everything. (If you don't know the reference, that's what Google is for...)

Some years ago, Hubby initiated a "birthday week" tradition in our family. So every day this week, I've been getting some sort of birthday present or treat. We had cake for holiday dessert, we went out to dinner tonight (with the kids, which always means restriction on restaurant choices, due to their picky eating habits...) and there is an 'event' this coming weekend.

Hubby asked sometime last week what I wanted for my birthday. I had been anticipating that question for a while, but really, there is nothing I want that you can buy in a store. I want my kids to stop fighting. I want my basement to be cleaned and unpacked. I want to lose weight and wear my clothes better. I want more time in my day for me and for exercise. I want to enjoy reading for fun again. I want to work less and earn more.

Somehow I'm thinking a trip to the mall isn't going to cover any of that - and that's even if Hubby would ever consider going to a mall, which he wouldn't.

So I emailed Hubby my Chapters wish list. Guess what I've been getting all week? Books right off my wish list. Not even wrapped. Sort of anti-climatic but whatever - when you've attained the pinnacle of all human wisdom and knowledge by getting to the answer of life, the universe and everything, I guess it's all coasting downhill from here!

Though I still have hopes that next year maybe the kids won't fight...

And so it goes

Hubby was at home sick today. We're blaming some soup that didn't agree with him. No one else ate it, he's much better 24 hrs later, thanks for asking. We're hoping that we're done with that and no one else will get ill. Touch wood.

Kid#1 is still struggling with braces. He now has lumps inside his cheeks from the constant rubbing. Only 6 more months - this round. Dental wax is our friend.

Kid#2 is still getting perfect (or higher) on his weekly French dictation. I have to admire his work ethic. We practice his new words a few times each week - almost once a day. He sets himself rules like how he will write out the hardest words 10 times, and how he will always get the bonus word right. I know a lot of MBA students who could learn from this. Actually, I could too.

I'm still way too busy but felt a lot better tonight after assembling my new shredder (well, I've had it for a few weeks but only now got it out of the box). Of course, we managed to jam it almost immediately, but hey - it's working now. It was cheap. You get what you pay for and all that. But my piles of paper are significantly lower now. And the kids have a new hobby.

And so it goes...

Happy (Canadian) Thanksgiving weekend!

Bracing for braces

Kid #1 is approximately 9.5 yrs old. I'm sure there's a site somewhere that would tell me *exactly* how old he is, but that would be a digression, distracting me from the real issue at hand - which is that my Kid#1 now has braces. And I really would like to be distracted from that.

He only has four brackets and the point is to align his top two central incisors (like the fancy terminology there?) but we know that this is just the first step on a long road of many orthodontic treatments.

Bottom line: his body is now filled with Advil and he's complaining about how horrible braces are. I never had them, and I still want to cry for him. He was so good in the ortho appointment, and now he's stuck with these miserable things for 6 months - and, as I said, we all know that this is just the first installment.

Installment makes me think of the money - and I'd really like to be distracted from that as well.

As I never had braces, I'm completely unprepared for the care that they require, the extra brushing and flossing, the restrictions on food (no popcorn?!?!?) and the pain and discomfort, that meant that Kid#1 had very little for dinner and ate very little lunch - even with the Advil in his growing body...

I'm sure that this too shall pass, and as I give empty reassurances, based only on my own fervent wishes, that his discomfort will fade, and that he will grow used to the braces and wires, I know that my own discomfort will also fade.

But chalk this one up as another thing I didn't know I was signing up for when I became a mother.

Sundays and Mondays

It's Sunday night. Garbage, picking up for the housecleaner, recycling, compost - ick. All just plain ick. I should have been a princess or a movie star - really.

Now that I work 40 hrs/wk in an office, I get why people dread Sundays and Mondays. For the first time in years, I actually look forward to a weekend - being in the house, not having to work, not having to constantly deal with someone else's unexpected problems - and as a career coach, I get a lot of SEPs (someone else's problems - tip of the hat to Douglas Adams...)

However, home is not a peaceful place either. We still have many boxes to unpack - and it seems like it's all the big ones left. Big ones with little things in them. The house feels small and the stuff feels big. Ick.

Cooking is a hassle. Getting the kids to eat is a hassle. Homework is a hassle. Staying on top of Facebook is even a hassle. Especially with the stupid new "Top Stories" thing.

I think I need an all-inclusive vacation. Without the kids. And with all of my work and email magically taken care of so that there is no backlog when I return.

If I return... ;-)

Of course, I speak too soon...

Saturday. Kid#1 has a birthday party to attend on Sunday. Kid#2 is jealous, upset, envious, sad - he wants to do something special too. "No problem!" I grandly proclaim. "When your brother is at the birthday party, you and I can do something else - you pick, we'll do it." After I dismiss plans to go to the Eiffel Tower, Egypt and Toronto, we settle on pizza for lunch, McDonald's play place and a run in the park. We're all set.

Sunday. Kid#1 gets set for his birthday party. Kid#2: "My tummy hurts." Me: "Well if your tummy hurts so much, maybe you should go and lie down."  Kid#2: "Ok". Clearly he's quite sick.

We don't go for our pizza lunch. We don't go to McDonald's. I sit on the side of his bed the entire afternoon while he lies watching kid movies. He occasionally complains about his tummy. He says he feels like throwing up, but can't. He doesn't eat all day. He doesn't have a fever, but clearly he's not well. I debate our options.

Sunday afternoon. I go get Kid#1 from the birthday party, and we go grocery shopping. When we get home, Hubby is on his hands and knees scrubbing the carpet. Apparently, when Kid#2's movie was over, he came downstairs and promptly threw up on the carpet. My unasked question to Hubby: what are you doing letting the sick kid wander around the house without a barf bucket nearby? What I say instead: "Thanks."

Kid#2 feels much better, but I give him Gravol for the night anyhow. In the morning, his appetite seems to be ok. He bounces off walls all day. He's seemingly healthy. He's resilient. I'm still stunned that we got hit with a back-to-school virus in the first week of back-to-school.

Hopefully that's it for the year - he should have built his resilience and immunity now - right?

We survived the first week of school!

Highlights from the first week of school - where Mom was going crazy with her new job, Dad was going crazy getting ready for his students (and a whole bunch of other things), and the Kids were freaking out because they *finally* realized that they had, in fact, missed a year of French. I had been telling them this all last year, but they didn't really take heed. Until the day before school when they decided to get all freaky and nervous and worried about it. But I digress...

New lunchboxes - for Kids and for Mom - From LL Bean. Exorbitant taxes and shipping and duties, so I also decided to order a couple of pairs of pants too.

No school supplies - schools here figure that stuff out on their own.

No back-to-school clothes - my boys don't care. Wear what they had in the summer, they're happy.

Except for shoes. Somehow, every year, I forget about the "indoor shoes" thing. Seems like the school wants to keep the classroom floors clean (go figure - probably has something to do with paying fewer custodians...) and so the kids have to change to their "indoor shoes" when they get into the hallway outside their classroom. Both kids are in portables this year, so it makes slightly less sense,but whatever.

Kid#1 came home on  Friday and told me that he didn't need indoor shoes anymore because the school gave him a pair. I still can't figure this out. I guess they are shoes from the school's lost and found or something, but he seems to think they are his. I have an email into the school to find out what the reality is, because Kid#1 told me that he "assumed" the shoes are his for the whole year so...

Oh a slight segue - by this time last year in Arlington, MA, we had already received several newsletters home and had the direct email address for each of our kids' teachers. Kingston, ON, schooling is a bit different - I have no idea what the teachers' email addresses are - no indication of how to get hold of them directly at all. Though I do have three nice newsletters from the teachers and school. With very little information, but lots of nice words.

And, on a final note, I'm already starting to see parents posting stuff on Facebook about how their kids are sick - the back-to-school flu or something. I'm already anxious about it. Can we please stop posting stuff about how sick we are or how much the kids threw up? It stresses me out. Thanks.

Advantages to having the family away for a week

A carton of ice cream lasts more than two days. And I don't have to fight anyone for it.

One medium pizza lasts for four meals.

Things stay where I put them.

Laundry only needs to be done once in 7 days.

Cooking dinner, eating dinner, and washing up takes about 15 minutes all put together.

Cleaning up from breakfast takes about 1 minute. Which means it can be done in the morning, instead of coming home to dirty dishes.

I don't mind changing the toilet paper roll - because there is no one else around who I would expect to do it.

It's quiet. And if I don't want quiet, I can choose to put on whatever music or radio station I want.

Yep - I'm enjoying myself.

I think I'm over-committing myself - again

Let's see - a full-time (contract) job. Two kids. Husband. House that still needs unpacking. Possible basement renovations. A client who wants a 'world-class' program designed and delivered by end of Sept. Another client who wants a "day or two" of Appreciative Inquiry instruction in Sept and Oct. Helping to form and run the Canadian Positive Psychology Association (interested? learn more here: http://www.positivepsychologycanada.com/membership.html). Oh - and I am running the upcoming CPPA conference next summer... Um - I'm sure I have a few other projects on the go: a book (which I will be intensively writing in November as a sort of NaNoWriMo that some of us MAPP people are doing... Did I mention that my kids missed a year of French while we were in Boston and I will need to work extra hard with them on school this year?

Yeah - I may be over-committed, again.

Excuse me please - I have to go reinstall my printer now...

At least we don't have any pets - though Kid#1 keeps asking for one. Which is better than Kid#2 who keeps asking for another kid in the family...

One of these days...

One of these days... the house will be unpacked. Everything will be in its place and there will be a place for everything.

That day, however, is not today - 4 weeks since we moved back from Boston.

I share this tidbit of information with people who don't have kids and I typically get this response: "Oh I could never let the unpacking go on so long! I'm one of those people who have to get everything unpacked the first day - I just stay up really late and it all gets done."

Can you hear the implied superiority? The implied nuance that I'm doing something wrong?

Argh.

Yes, I used to be one of those people. I also used to be single without kids.

Here's the problem with moving with kids:
- you have more stuff - way more in proportion to, say, four adults. Two adults and two kids have way more stuff.
- and you have fewer helpers. Kids help way less than the amount of stuff they generate. Way less.

So with more stuff (most of which is going in the garage sale that we'll have in a couple of weeks) and fewer helpers (who are not going in the garage sale - but if they help staff it, they will get a cut of the proceeds...), then you have unpacking that takes over 4 weeks.

Mathematically, it's a disaster, no matter how you slice it.

On the other hand, Hubby has the two Kids at the cottage this week and I'm 'stuck' in town working. More time to unpack - and fidget around on the computer, I admit it. But I have unpacked a bunch of boxes and filed a bunch of papers, and that's all good. The house won't be all bright and shiny and organized by the time school starts, but I'll have made a valiant effort.

Stay tuned...

Well it got busy

Could you tell it got a bit busy for us? We are back in Ontario now - and my house is still (2 weeks later) filled with boxes. Any sane person would have taken a week off and tended to these things, but clearly I am not sane.

So, in order...

We packed up the Somerville place, got the u-haul, packed up all the stuff from our storage and apt into the u-haul and set out. We spent about 6 hrs driving into NY and then spent a day at Water Safari park (near Old Forge, or something like that) and then drove the next day to the border, where the very nice guard was clearly impressed with our typed list of our worldly possessions and waved us through. So we got to our Kingston home around 10:30am on August 1.

We (meaning, mostly my husband and the hired help) unloaded the truck, and did two trips to unload everything from our Kingston storage location. We spent Monday unpacking (meaning, mostly me and hubby - the kids just hid from the chaos...) and then Tues, the adults went to work and the kids went to camp.

We're still unpacking.

As for work, I thought I was coming back to a full-time permanent position and a seat at the decision-making table, but I'm coming back to more contract hours (though an actual office that's not in my basement) and a new reporting structure so I'm cut off from all those upper-level discussions and decisions. Oh, and more students and more complex situations than I knew of. Deciding if I should a) quit, b) have a nervous breakdown or c) just deal with it, which is what I typically do. And I wonder why no one gets to see me at my best...

Currently, as I type this, I'm on the train to Toronto for a series of promising meetings on Monday. If they work out, maybe (a) will be more of an option.

In other news, hubby is in a potential strike position and the boys have two more weeks of summer camp left. The last week of August, hubby is taking vacation (assuming he has a job to take vacation from) and will be at the cottage with the boys. I will stay in the city working. And you know, that just might be enough of a vacation for me... I suspect I will do a lot of unpacking...

10 more days

In 10 days, we will be packing up for our journey back to Canada. We get the U-Haul truck July 30 and load up everything from our MA storage and apartment and head to Kingston. We're looking for something fun to do along the way so that when we land back in Kingston August 1, we'll have had a teeny vacation. Teeny.

Boys are excited, looking forward to seeing their friends again. Kid#1 recently quipped, "You know, when we get back, all of my friends will look the same to me because we will have all grown taller together, but all of the adults will tell me how much I've grown." Too true, too true.

Kids are at a new camp this week that involves a one-hour bus ride to get there and another one-hour bus ride to come back - their first experience with regular bussing. Kid#1, my anti-social brooder, sits by himself in the very last seat of the bus. Kid#2, my highly social would-talk-to-a-tree kid, sits up in the very front seat with the bus supervisor and a bunch of other kids. Neither of them wave goodbye out the window. Somehow, this all makes sense to me.

Also gives me much longer days for work since I am now working 8-4:30 (bus pick up is 7:45am - EEK!) instead of 9:20-3:00 which is what I was doing since I provided the transportation for the last camp. This has also been an interesting shift - a little more spare time during the day without the kids. I do email and work, of course, but also have been reading the odd magazines that come into the apartment.

We are renting from two guys who told us that they get some unusual magazines and they don't know why. I think they just told us that so we wouldn't think they were too weird. So we get Vanity Fair and Redbook, as well as Time. Variety being the spice of life and all that.

Laundry is going - invoices are awaiting. Have a great one.

Still here

We are still in Somerville. The cat is still alive. Boys just finished up two weeks of a great camp at Audubon Habitat in Belmont. We had to drive them there through four different towns - just gives you a funny idea about how the Boston area is (not) structured: we'd start in Somerville, go through Cambridge, scoot into Arlington and then head into Belmont - all in about 3.5 miles and 12 minutes. I love this place.

On the other hand, my phone's GPS has stopped working and so trying to get to a friend's place in Jamaica Plain was... well... interesting. Fortunately I have learned how to take deep breaths and just be late instead of being frustrated and late.

Two more weeks until the big move back to Kingston. I am looking forward to being back in my house with my stuff. I am not looking forward to packing, driving and unpacking. And I will miss Amazon.com (the .ca is not nearly as good) and Zappos. On the other hand, I do foresee lots of reasons to be back state-side in the near future and hey, it's not all that far anyhow!

Last thing of note - I now seem to be on Google Plus, which is like Facebook but not nearly as populated. We'll see where that goes. If you're on there, send me a note. We'll connect - or put each other into circles I guess.

Somerville MA

We are now living in Somerville for the month of July. It's a loft-style apartment, one-bedroom (which the kids are currently sharing, longer-term arrangements TBD) and we are on the main floor with the bedrooms in the basement. It's quite a change from our previous arrangement in Arlington. We managed to make the move with scarce minutes to spare in returning the U-Haul truck. Well actually we returned it late, but no one yelled at us or charged us anything extra.

Boys are just coming home from the first grocery shopping trip. We'll see what they got. In the meantime, we are also looking after a 22-yr old cat, who surprised us by still being alive the day we moved in. We'll see if she survives the month with the kids around. On the other hand, the wifi works...

Panic update

Boys elected to take Mon evening "off" as we spent the day at Plimoth Plantation and saw the MayflowerII and then were stuck in Boston rush-hour traffic getting home from the Cape. At least they did, after some yelling (from me) help to unpack the car.

Tonight will be groceries (so they have lunch for their daycamp) and packing, packing, packing. I think I'll make them tackle the Lego tonight. I'm so mean...

Let the panic commence

I have spent the last week at a conference in Denver. I come home to find.... nothing has changed. Under typical circumstances, this would be a good thing except these are not typical circumstances - we are moving in less than one week. Completely out of our current locale and into another locale (with some things going into ye olde storage shed). No boxes have been packed during my absence.

I am now about to head off to yonder camping site at ye olde Cape Cod for the weekend (rainy and cool as I type this before departing) and will return Monday afternoon with two kids and no hubby, as he will be presenting something official in DC. Good for him - sucks for me. He only returns very very late Weds night. We need to be out of our place Fri morning.

Do you see the problem?

Let the panic commence...

Revelations

Had a revelation last night - I don't have to do it all. DOH! You think I'd learn by now.

I am putting my business on serious hold - just updated the blog with a list of people and resources who tackle my favourite topics (positive psychology, leadership, positive workplaces, etc) much better than I do anyhow. I was reading one of them the other day and lamenting that really, I had nothing new to contribute at all. So LVS Consulting is temporarily shut down for the summer. We'll see if I have any interest in reviving it in September.

And I just just just got a call that we have the possibility of two spaces in a before- and after-school program for my kids. The last two spaces. YAY! Now to make sure we actually get them....

I deleted a whole bunch of emails from my inbox. I'll just never get to them. So there.

And I'm going to remove my contributions from a couple of websites where I'd been freely writing about positive psychology. I gotta focus on the paying job and the moves coming up. Gotta.

I'll keep blurting here though. This takes no brain cells at all. :-)

You think I'd learn by now....

OMFG....

It is June 15. We move out of our place on June 30th. Well, technically we can move the morning of July 1, but everything really has to be packed for June 30th because July 1 will be all about waking up, washing up, eating breakfast, making sure the last few things are packed, cleaning the apartment, loading the moving van and getting out. So we have 15 days.

During those 15 days, I will be away for four days. Hubby will be away for three days. That's only 7 days of togetherness during which we can pack and get stuff moving along. Now you think we'd be in decent shape because we sent a bunch of winter stuff back to Canada, but we still have way too much stuff.

Way. Too. Much. Stuff.

I mean, every family with kids has way too much stuff. We have more than that.

And work is overwhelming. This working virtually stuff isn't working - but that's another matter. I'm missing the ability to walk down the hallway, talk with someone for 20 seconds and get answers to quick questions. Phone calls and emails all can be ignored and forgotten and answers take hours or days instead. Bleh.

And I found out that the boys are not enrolled in the after-school care program that we usually use back home so now I'm looking for an alternative.

And there are a few other things that are making my life very difficult.

I think I'm going to give up. Everything.

Help? Any strategies - other than taking deep breaths and taking it one day at a time, because that's what I'm already doing and it's not working so far.

New Yahk

I spent this past weekend in New York City visiting with a friend who kindly let me stay in her mid-Manhattan apartment (over by the United Nations) and seeing the sights. A few things of note:

- Billy Elliott was great and made me laugh and cry. It was my first Broadway show, but also encouraging to know that shows I've seen in Stratford and Toronto (both in Ontario) are of similar calibre. We get good (really good) live theatre in Canada too.

- People don't dress up for Broadway shows. At all. It was like walking through a shopping mall.

- Speaking of shopping, yes I did shopping! Great buys and great selection. I think I need a NYC fashion trip annually. Watch out credit card!!

- It was truly lovely to "be myself" again - no kids, no hubby, no schedule. Just me and my friends. Getting to bed at midnight, sleeping until 9 - back in my true and natural rhythm. I didn't feel tired and I walked most everywhere - except, of course, when we took cabs...

- And speaking of walking, I did so much walking and ate little (due to the heat and lack of time - but I always conscientiously made healthy choices and drank LOTS of water) and still returned home at the same weight as when I left. So disappointed! C'mon body - what do you want from me?

- I do want to go back with the kids - when they're a bit older and we somehow figure out the perfect weather so it isn't too hot (100F on Thurs) or too cold (about 60F on Sun - yes, I experienced that much of a temperature change!)

It was a great great time. Now onto packing up the Arlington apt so we move to Somerville on July 1. EEK!

Would you do it?

We were at a museum shop (for the USS Constitution) and there was a big long wooden toy rifle-like thing (that looks sort of like the bottom rifle thing in this picture: http://myuniquewoodentoys.com/pro1092982.html) that Kid#1 really wants. Dad already said no, so he asks Mom. Mom, foolishly, asks to see it. It's huge. About as tall as me. Or seems like it. Mom also says no, but Kid#1 senses that it's not a totally firm no and so the request has been continuing for days. Well, two days so far.

Today's offer from Kid#1: that he will get his hair cut and not fight for an entire month if we agree to buy him the gun. It's sort of tempting, but I really don't want him having it. I just predict bad things. On the other hand, I don't think he can go a month without fighting - and I'd make sure he got his hair cut first...

What would you do?

You know...

Just when I think I'm starting to get on top of things, things get on top of me...

On the other hand - Kid#1 does have his book report done. And is now wondering what else he can do for the class!

Oh help....

In which Lisa's parenting skills are put to the test.

Kid#1 is in Grade Three. In Grade Three at this particular school, they have a biography project to do. Kid#1 picks a book about Albert Einstein. Over the past several weeks, the students have had to:

1. read the entire book
2. re-read chapter 1 and take notes
3. re-read chapter 2 and take notes
4. re-read chapter 3 and take notes
5. repeat, etc, etc, etc,

You get the idea. They have a long time to do this and each chapter in the book is fairly short. The notes are answers to questions that the teacher has provided in a booklet. So far, so good. Everything is pretty well-structured and there is a lot of time.

And then - CATASTROPHE! It's time to write the report!

To be honest, Kid#1 had the choice of about six different options, including writing a report, doing a presentation, making a skit, etc. Option #6  was, of course, "something else" whereby the student could come up with a creative idea not already listed, discuss it with the teacher, and move ahead with the approved plan.

So why did Kid#1 pick a report? I mean, of all the boringest of options.... but whatever -  he is 9 yrs old and he gets to pick.

Yesterday, on non-holiday Monday, Kid#1 is in a seriously foul mood when I pick him up after school. Later, I realize that this is probably because in class, they have had to pick their "presentation dates" for their biography projects. Kid#1, of course, doesn't share this until later when he off-handedly and eye-rollingly says that he picked the last possible date for his project because he doesn't even know if he'll be done by then... (I wish that the actual exaggerated fatigue and burden of the world inherent in the tone of his voice resonated better over the virtual print media...)

Over the past couple of weeks, Kid#1 has been typing out his report. He can't type. He can't even hunt and peck. He is about one word per minute. But he was trying. Really. Really. Hard. But, as you  might expect, he's gotten tired of this glacial pace and the energy has slowed. Hubby and I have collaborated - how do we assist in this process without actually doing all of the work for him? Kid#1 has an idea - he will dictate to me and I will type out what he says. Hubby scoffs at this, and says that's what the oldest kid does in the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books. I remind Hubby that we're dealing with real life here, and not some cartoon fiction. Hubby, surprisingly, does not appreciate me making this distinction clear for him.

Finally, on that non-holiday Monday, I propose to Kid#1 that he needs to write out a project outline, and then we will match his notes to the outline, I will type out his notes (because, in my mind, it's just the skill of typing that is missing - he's done all the other work) and then he can review and revise and format and all those other good things. 

Kid#1 GROANS and MOANS and DIES and COMPLAINS that this is way too much work. I explain very clearly what a project outline is (just a few words - not the whole idea) and why it's important and what it will be used for next and how it doesn't have to be neat and how his teacher will never see it, etc, etc, etc, etc.

An hour and a half later, after much crying and wailing and gnashing of teeth (him, not me -  mostly), the outline finally emerges. 

I wish to pat myself on my back for only isolating him to his room and for not losing it completely. It is times like this that put us to the test.

Now today, I'm going to force him to align his previously-written notes to the new outline. Wish us both luck.

I hate saying "no"

Had a parent email me at 6:30 this morning to ask me to help out with something at 8:30am that would have been really interesting and really worthwhile and really fun (in my geeky organizational development sort of way) but I had to say "no" because I found out too late and had other things to do and wasn't prepared and it would have gone on too long...

I hate saying "no" to opportunities.

So why is it so easy to say "no" to my kids when they ask for all that candy at the grocery store? Sheesh....

The single parenting shtick

I have a few friends who are single parents for various reasons. They laugh at me (yes, I know that you do) when I complain about having to do the single parenting shtick for a while. Last week, I was away for 4 days in luxury. Well, not quite real luxury, but without my kids so it felt that way. I was working long hours and had a lot of other things on the go, but it's not quite the same as having the kids around. Somehow, long hours and hard work are energizing without the kids. I only need my energy for me and I get to make more choices and there are fewer demands.

So I guess it's only fair that this week, hubby is away for a few days and so I am doing the single parenting. So far, touch wood - we seem to be doing ok. It's easier now that the kids are older. I used to get incredibly stressed out about my single parenting episodes. When the kids were in diapers, or not sleeping well at night, or unable to be left safely alone without constant surveillance, then it was seriously stressful. Now, with the boys at 9 and 7 yrs old, they can sit and eat without me if need be. They can get an apple from the fridge, wash it and eat it if they are screamingly hungry and can't wait the 15 minutes until dinner. They can sit and read and do their own homework. They can even (gasp!) operate the DVD player if they are really bored, though this morning when I suggested that they might wish to watch a movie while I was in the shower, they decided instead to leaf through old Lego magazines and play on the electronic keyboard... (which I think is quite amazing really and I'm totally proud of their choice to do that!)

I'm certainly not wonder-mom for doing this - there are many parents out there who successfully and patiently look after their kids day in and day out on their own. For me, this is a change of scenery, that's all - but it's a good one. Makes me appreciate the hubby a bit more.

You know it's a bad start to the day when...

** WARNING: This post contains no blood or vomit or other bodily fluids and does contain a lot of self-pity that any normal mother would roll her eyes at... 

So at 4:40am this morning, I get a little knock on the door from Kid#1 - he's been having nightmares and can't get back to sleep. Of COURSE he's having nightmares - Hubby and I were actually out on a date night for the first time in forevah and we had a sitter and the sitter put them to bed, which meant a break from routine, and Hubby and I were in bed late - so the conditions were ripe for a bad night's sleep for the Kiddle.

Hubby isn't budging so I go into the Kid's room and stay with him, fitfully dozing beside him on the single mattress, until 6:50am when I finally wake up enough to get to my shower and the usual stuff of the morning. Hubby sees me in the hallway and, all bright and bushy-tailed, asked how I was doing. I'm proud of myself that I didn't bite his head off for being such an enviable solid sleeper...

Kids were both veeerrrrryyyy sssslllloooooooooooowww to get up out of bed which meant breakfast was rush rush rush. Then, of COURSE, it's "bring your bike to school" because there's a bike lesson after school with the police department in honour of TV turn-off week (see how this works?) so Kid#2 wants to bike to school - which means finding the bike, and the helmet, and the lock... Kid#1, after saying that yes, he did want to bike, now says no, he won't bike (and I bet this will change again at the end of the day but too bad, so sad...) so I head to the garage with Kid#2 to find his bike (etc) and tell Kid#1 to meet us in front of the house for the walk to school.

So Kid#2 finds his bike, but then we can't find Kid#1. He has disappeared - somewhere. I yell into the house - he's not there. His backpack isn't inside, but I have to leave because Kid#2 has already taken off on his bike down the street towards the school... ARGH! At least Hubby is still home, so if Kid#1 is inside the house, he's not alone. And really, at 9 yrs old, if he was alone for 15 minutes, he'd be fine...

Off I run (and I'm not a runner) to school after Kid#2 and, you guessed it, Kid#1 is already there. RIOT ACT TIME!!! He says that oh, he left after us and followed us to school. So how, Einstein, did he get to school before us? Einstein might have had something to say about that - Kid#2 does not.

Oh - and then I forgot the bike lock because I was so busy looking for Kid#1... So after Kid#2 and I lean his bike against the fence, I RUN back home (did I mention I'm not a runner?) and get the lock, which I then successfully foist upon the departing Hubby so that he can take the lock to the school on his way to work in the car - and so I don't have to do anymore running...

Anyhow, I finally did get home and into my work of a busy day - and you know what snapped me out of my bad mood? This video right here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8TwRmX6zs4&feature=player_embedded

Enjoy!

** End of pity party. ;-)


PS> Any Canadian readers had better be voting today!!!

Three words from my kid that strike the most fear into my heart

"My tummy hurts".

Gives me a minor heart attack. Every. Single. Time.

Today's lazy mom excuses

It's much easier to sweep up bread and cake crumbs the next day, after they've dried out on the floor.

The longest birthday week ever

We have a tradition in our family that birthdays are actually birthday weeks. It started about 5 years ago, when I was having a birthday. My husband determined that I should have a celebration that lasted all week long and our kids, aged about 1 and 3 at the time, went along with it because who doesn't like a party?

The next birthday after mine was for my Kid#1, turning 4 at the time. Of course, he wanted a birthday week, just like mommy - and somehow, because hubby was very busy at the time, I ended up organizing it.

The next birthday was hubby's - and of course, he's not going to organize his own birthday week - so I did that one too.

And then the next birthday was Kid#2 who was turning 2 and really didn't know what a birthday was or really remembered that anyone else had even had a birthday week, but Kid#1 keeps special track of these things and so we had a birthday week for Kid#2 as well. Which I organized.

This pattern has remained pretty much ever since - I seem to organize 3 out of 4 birthday weeks in our family, and it was originally hubby's idea. Thanks dear.

This year, since we've been in Boston, birthdays have been a bit of a bust .We have no close friends or family to invite over and life seems to be even busier here than it ever was back home, so birthday weeks consist of very small events - or else really big outings. Kid#1's birthday coincided with a family trip to NYC. His birthday gifts consisted of souvenirs from just about every place we went - and he got a huge Lego set to boot.

For Kid#2's birthday, it coincided with a school vacation week and we went to DC. However, we also spent many long hours in the car - including about 8 hours on the actual birthday day. Not exactly the great way to spend a birthday. And so his birthday week, which was supposed to be just the vacation week, seems to be extended. Although he already decorated birthday cupcakes, he has also taken birthday treats into school AND gotten a home-made and mommy-decorated birthday cake. And although he already got lots of souvenir birthday presents from our various stops in DC, he is also getting a huge Lego set (TBD) and maybe a party at a movie theatre.

All I can say is that this had better not be a new tradition - because I already work hard enough planning three birthday weeks in three months for the other three members of my family. I'm not really interested in making it a birthday fortnight!

Our trip to DC

Last week was a school holiday so we headed to DC. It's a far drive from Boston, but luckily our boys were entertained by several DVDs in the car. I remember lengthy drives to Halifax and Chicago when I was a kid, before DVDs, and I have no idea how my parents survived. I'm pretty sure that my brother and I were the biggest back-seat fighters ever, though my two kids do their best to rival us for that title. Anyhow, let's just say that I love whoever created the ability for kids to watch movies in the backseat. It is probably saving their lives.

We stayed at a huge hotel that had a pool that wasn't open, had free wifi only in the lobby and gave free breakfasts for the adults. It wasn't quite what we expected, but it worked out. Thankfully, I packed camping mattresses because, even though the kids said they would be fine sharing a bed, that only lasted two nights and we were there for 4 - not to mention a night on the way down in another hotel and a night on the way back in yet another hotel. I have a lot of little bottles of shampoo, conditioner and body lotion from this trip.

Overall, some of the sights we saw included a Capitol Hill tour (very cool - we sat in the actual seats of the congressmen and women...), strolling the Mall, Smithsonian Air & Space (both at the Mall and at Dulles airport) and the International Spy Museum. That last one was my fav but people weren't allowed to take pics, so I have no visual evidence that I was even there. I was a little hesitant about taking the boys because now they have a whole new bunch of stealth tactics to choose from, including crawling through duct work and hiding in with their surroundings. But they still laugh loudly while doing it, so I think my secrets are safe.

Other news of note: Kid#2 turned 7 while on the trip and is feeling all big and tall and proud of himself. We came home in time for Easter Sunday. At 8:30pm Saturday night, after putting the kids to bed, hubby looked at me and said "So... about Easter..." whereupon I showed him the bag of plastic Easter eggs, each one filled with Easter candy, all ready for us for the Easter Bunny to hide. He is so lucky to have married me - or else he'd be running out in the middle of the night for Easter provisions. Honestly, you all should email him and tell him how lucky he is.

Easter Sunday started off too early with Kid#2 waking at 5:50am. We convinced him to wait until 7am but I doubt he went back to sleep. He found most of his eggs before Kid#1 even opened a single eyelid. And they're pretty much on continuous sugar highs ever since.

Today, Monday, is back at school and I'm wading through approximately 24 gazillion emails. And realizing that we only have about 2 more months in this apartment before we move to another one for July. And then we had back to Kingston. So much still to do here, but I'm also looking forward to being home again.

Oh - and by the way...

My computer keeps running out of C: space. I can't tell you how frustrating this is....

*(&&(#$ I hate taxes

Taxes this year are a nightmare. I'm still self-employed, but from the US, and I have no idea how this works. I have spent WAY TOO MANY hours on taxes this year and my income last year was dismal - one of my lowest ever - so it seems even worse to spend days and days and fretful hours not sleeping figuring out this nonsense. And yes, we have an accountant do it - but I still need to pull together all the stupid forms and receipts and other bits of paper and make sure that I'm not missing anything. In the past several days, my list of things that I'm missing has only gotten longer. I hate taxes.

Why am I up?

It's 11pm and I should be in bed. I flew to LA on Sunday and spent 3 days at a great conference (on career coaching) and flew back pretty much all day yesterday, landing at 1am Boston time which is about 10pm LA time. That wasn't the hard part. The hard part was waking up this morning at 7am Boston time, meaning I had about 5 hours of sleep after a very very long day. But here I am - up and feeling just fine with my darned nocturnal body clock. Thank you so much.

In other news, I finally got to see the final production of the school play that I wrote and co-directed. The kids were just so darned cute in their costumes and make-up and it did come together really well. Kids who were so quiet at the start of the rehearsals back in January knew their lines and spoke quite well, although I still think that most of the audience wouldn't know what was being said half the time...

I'm such a perfectionist and it drives me nuts. I know those kids worked hard, but I still saw and felt every little error... Ah well. For me, it was a great opportunity to remember what I enjoyed about amateur theatre. And for the kids, it's something that I hope they will remember forever - possibly their first time on stage for some of them!

Friday (tomorrow) after school is the cast party - I've been told to show up with a Sharpie because we get ice cream and we sign everyone's t-shirts. I guess I'd better get some sleep to keep up with that energy! G'night!

Ok - I'm better now

After arriving home late Weds (seems like an eternity ago!) and getting caught up on work today, and finding out that the kids aren't really all that horrible (at least, no more than I remember...), I'm feeling a bit better. But will be leaving again soon for a conference next week.

Kid#1 will be helping with lighting in the upcoming school play (that I wrote and co-directed, but that's another story) and Kid#2 will have a small part with a bunch of other K-2 students, running in during a scene to be a crowd for a story-telling festival. Somehow, during the time I am gone, Hubby will just have to deal with getting the kids to where they need to be and then home again.

We've cancelled French lessons for the week (I'm pretty sure that, after this year, my kids will be French Immersion drop outs) but kept the piano lesson. Kid#2, who is nearly 7, asked his teacher to leave him something in B major - the scale that has 5 sharps. And then he got frustrated when he couldn't play it. He's got aspirations for sure...

And I will be arriving back after the conference at 1am on Thurs morning, just in time to get home, crash in bed, and wake up 5 hours later for a full day of work and attending the school play that night. I'm sure my hallucinations will be temporary.

Otherwise, it's game on and life as normal. And how are things with you?

Get me outta here!

After three days away back in Ontario, I came home to a tired and grumpy hubby who told me all about the miserable things the boys did while I was gone and how difficult they were. After 10 minutes, I just about picked up my luggage from the front hallway and turned around and left again.

Well at least the  next morning, when I finally saw them awake, they were in fairly good moods and our day unfolded pretty much as it always does - it certainly wasn't the nightmare I was expecting.

Kid#1 is back playing soccer and had his first practice tonight and Kid#2 gets into his team this weekend. This means that, on the good side, we are back with regular activities on the weekend and, on the bad side, we are back with regular activities right in the middle of each Saturday and each Sunday until the last week of June. I don't mind exactly having that to anchor each day around, but it does get in the way of things like spending the day downtown Boston or heading out for a day-trip to a beach. But oh well - we will survive and the boys will get a team activity out of it all.

In other news, I'm away again for a few days next week which is good - I hope hubby toughens up his skin for my absence. And then the week after that is school vacation around here. We have a trip to DC planned. The big question: will there be a government shut-down? And if there is, can we book a last-minute cheap trip to Disney instead?

Particularly ugly April Fool's Day

This morning dawned with all the greatness of a really bad April Fool's Day - Mother Nature overnight dropped a couple of inches of the white slushy wet stuff, and it wasn't cream cheese frosting. The boys tried to convince me that it was a snow day and school was cancelled - April Fool's!!

I've never really liked April Fool's day. I've never really liked Hallowe'en either. I think it comes from detesting trickery and not liking deceit. Or else it's because I'm such a perfectionist that I wanted the PERFECT trick and deceit. Or else I'm just a wimp. Take your choice.

The best April Fool's joke I remember - and it wasn't mine - was in middle school when some kid showed up with a bunch of stale mini-marshmellows and put them on the chalkboard ledge, replacing the chalk. When the teacher picked up the mini-marshmellow, it felt like chalk, but didn't write on the board. The teacher went through a couple of "chalk stubs" before realizing the joke.

See - to me, that's clever and no one gets hurt - the perfect April Fool's joke!

Though when I was teaching, I hated April Fool's even more. And Hallowe'en - I never volunteered to supervise the Hallowe'en dance at high school, and they let me get away with it because I supervised more than my fair share the rest of the year. But there was no getting away from April Fool's.

So today my kids tried to fool me several times with the still sleeping joke, the "I can't find my clothes" joke and the "my tummy hurts" joke. Oh wait - none of those were actually tricks... that's our normal morning.

Ah well - the Internet has made April Fool's all that much easier to bear. I can see what the various big sites are doing for their pranks - Google usually has a good one and this year, Groupon trademarked April Fool's. That's kinda cute. But I can watch these from the safety of my own home office, and not have to worry about someone swapping out the sugar for salt in my tea.

Have a good one y'all!

Uncle John

Received word today that my dad's brother John died quite suddenly. A good friend who visits him daily was unable to reach him by phone and went around to the house and discovered his body on the floor, quite at peace. Although John had lung problems for years, it does not seem to have been a respiratory attack that took him - probably something much more sudden and painless, thankfully.

I wish I could regale you all with stories, but the truth is that I hadn't seen him in over a decade and my childhood memories of him are quite faded. He was tall and highly intelligent. Apparently he had quite a knack for foreign languages and, from his Facebook postings, enjoyed playing with the English language. I never quite understood his sense of humour, but I know it was sparkling and witty. Any inability to 'get it' lies entirely with me.

John also had his share of difficulties in life.  A first marriage ended in divorce and family (two daughters) who eventually relocated across the country. A second marriage brought two sons who died in a plane crash (the older son was piloting and the younger one went along for the ride) and his second wife died as well. John lived alone, but he was not lonely. He had a rich social life and my dad says that sometimes it was hard to reach him on the phone, because he was out with friends or participating in some activity.

I talked at some length with my dad this evening and he's doing well and will be travelling to help with arrangements and be at the funeral. When I announced the death to my boys, who had never met my Uncle John, my youngest got quite sad and said "I never met him, and now I never will" - clearly quite attached to this relative he never knew. My oldest was a little more philosophical and cerebral, commenting about how there are many family members that we never meet, and how, in fact, we never meet most of our family.

Both got extra special long hugs today as a special request from their Grandpa.

I wish the same for everyone out there. Extra special long hugs to and from those you love.

The $80 dessert

Yesterday we embarked on one of Hubby's adventures. Hubby occasionally gets these ideas like, "Oh let's go for a little hike" and 5 miles and 5,000 feet up later, you realize that you have different definitions of "little". Or Hubby will say, "Let's do a family dinner at this great restaurant that's one of Boston's best!" and you get there and realize it's a seafood restaurant - like a serious one - where you don't recognize anything on the menu and they have no kids' menu and so your kids (who are, after all, part of the family) are grumpy because there is no pizza or pasta and you realize that you have a different definition of "great".

Can you tell where this is going?

For months, since moving to Boston, Hubby has had this idea that we should do a nice family dinner or something at Top of the Hub restaurant.

Top of the Hub is at the top of the Prudential Building, 52 floors up. It has a lovely view of Boston and area, and the boys and I visited the building back in the late summer. We went to the observation level on the 50th floor and paid for the privilege. We spent an hour or so there viewing (Kid#2 especially likes being in high places and looking down on others... hmm....) but Hubby was not with us as he was working. So I think he's had Prudential Building envy.

We have also been using Top of the Hub as a sort of bribe to get the kids to exhibit better manners at home. If they show good "Top of the Hub" manners, like using a fork for salad, sitting through the whole meal, saying please and thank you, and not dipping their fingers in the milk, then we would go to the Top of the Hub. Lately, the boys have been accusing us of lying - that we would never go to Top of the Hub.

So this weekend, we went. For dessert. We had lunch at home and then went out to the Mapparium (which was extremely cool!) and then dessert at Top of the Hub. I insisted that we check the online menu first to see if there were even desserts that our kids would want to order. Yes, I have picky kids. In France, we took them into a patisserie and offered them "anything they wanted". Kid#2 picked a plain butter croissant and Kid#1 couldn't find anything he liked until he saw the American-style chocolate chip cookies. Sigh...

But I digress.

Kid#1 had a minor freak-out as soon as we sat down because the place was "too grown-uppy". Kid#2 was on good behaviour because hey, if his brother was going to try and wreck things by being bad, then Kid#2 was going to be downright angelic. The kids both had a "wazzup" moment with the dessert menu though (which was buried in the middle of the cocktails menu, which was a whole other discussion....). They both settled on the fresh-baked cookie platter - 12 cookies fresh out of the oven. We ascertained that we could substitute the peanut butter cookies for something else (really? a restaurant that still makes peanut butter cookies and the waitress wasn't sure if we could swap them out?)  Hubby went into over-spoiling mode by declaring that each child could have his own platter. (!!!!!)

Hubby and I each had a chocolate molten lava cake with blackberry ice cream. Photos are on my Facebook page (in case you are interested).

Well four gingerales (no free refills), one coffee and four extraordinary desserts later, with tax and tip, the total was just over $80. Adventure indeed.

On the other hand, the boys have left-over cookies for the entire week's worth of school lunches. On the other other hand, Kid#1 complained about a stuffed tummy for the rest of the evening and Kid#2 is at home today with a hurting tummy that he suspects is from "too much melty chocolate in the cookies". Sigh.

Next time, we'll go without the kids and spend the money on the sitter. And I don't think our "Top of the Hub" bribe will be at all effective henceforth. I do have to wonder what Hubby's next adventure proposal will be...

Games in the playground

As the weather has been getting nicer, on the two days each week when I pick the boys up directly after school. we have been spending more time in the playground instead of rushing straight home. Typically, the discussion has gone something like this:

Me: Shall we play outside a bit or head home?
Kid#1: Home!
Kid#2: Play!

When we have let Kid#1 prevail and headed straight home, he proclaims himself to be bored within minutes and is a real rascal by the end of the evening. So I've stopped asking and I just tell them to go and run around. Kid#1 still proclaims that there is nothing to do, but he finds someone to play with after a few minutes, or plays "off the wall" with other boys and the endless stream of tennis balls that he collects in his backpack.

The kids don't really need me around except as a backpack overseer so I also get to watch how the other kids play.

The other day, I noticed a boy crouched on the ground with his hands up to his eyes. Another boy was next to him with his hands over his ears. I was worried that someone was hurt or they had collided and I was about to go over when I noticed that there was also a girl in front of them singing and dancing. Then I realized - they were playing MTV! The one boy was the camera man and the other was the sound guy and the girl was some superstar, playing it up for her virtual audience.

We've come a long way from cops and robbers...

Saturday morning

Sun streaming in. Breakfast dishes cleaned. Boys playing Lego. Me on the computer. Hubby doing his own thing. Hot tea. This is just about ideal....

Time to go shake things up and blow a snotty kid's nose...

Rites of childhood

Today was another milestone marker - Kid#2 is riding a two-wheeler for the first time! No training wheels! On the other hand, he's now exhausted and screaming a lot. I'll remember his two-wheeling riding instead.

So after school, I picked up the boys and we (they) played for a while in the school playground. It's actually city land, with a big play-yard, but the school kids have use of it during the day for lunch hour and so on. Great facility. Kid#1 proclaimed himself to be bored and wanted to bike. I guess there were probably kids around there biking. So home we go and drag out the bikes. I mean, literally drag them up from the basement where they've spent the winter.

It is clear - very clear - that Kid#2 has grown way too tall for his little yellow bike with the training wheels. The next size up (which we brought with us from Kingston, just in case) doesn't have training wheels. So I ask, "Are you ready for riding a bike without training wheels?" I mean, the kid is almost 7. Of course he's ready. And he's an eternal optimist, so I bring up the new green bike without the training wheels.

Tire pressure seemed ok (like I know about these things) so off we head to the school yard - again. Streets, as you can imagine, are a little dangerous for newbies on these bike thingies, but the school yard has a very large, conveniently flat area that is for a splash pad and kick ball and a few other things - so we head there.

Kid#1, like a cycling pro, races off around the school, asks for a trick bike, and bikes fast off any sort of jump-like thing he can find - curbs, retaining walls, random piles of dirt.

Kid#2 alternates between "I will NEVER be able to do this" to "Hey, look at me! I'm biking!!!" and eventually gets the hang of it quite well - keeping his balance (mostly) and looking ahead at where he's going instead of looking down at his miraculously pedaling feet (mostly).

Only two problems with Kid#2's style.

1. He can't seem to go in a straight line.
2. He doesn't use the brakes.

Apart from that, he's great!

Heading home, we see Daddy biking back from work and he's pretty impressed with Kid#2's progress. Later, Hubby says to me, "You're a good mom".

Yeah. Sometimes I am.

Update

Email back from modern apt owner - he has agreed to rent to us. Break out the champagne! But quietly... At least we won't be homeless for July. Or camping for the entire month. Or sleeping in our tiny subcompact car. All of which were possibilities of varying degrees...

In other news, I finally realized that comments were set to "moderated" on this blog (duh) and so I looked at them and approved a couple. I also realized that *anyone* could comment, even if they were "anonymous". Well anonymous comments sort of freak me out (especially when they're short and vague, like these ones were) so I deleted them and changed the settings so you can't post anonymous comments anymore. Begone spambots and cybercrawlers! And anonymous whoever you are.

Why would someone put a white couch in a rental unit?

We are only renting our current place until June 30. However Hubby's agreement with Harvard is he will be there until July 31. Also, our place back home is rented out until July 31. This raises the small problem of where we will live for the month of July. Even though Hubby keeps reminding me that "we have a tent", I'm not too keen on that option so I've been pushing for a real apartment to rent for July.

We saw one a couple of days ago that was ok but not entirely suitable. The place said it was good for kids, but they had a white couch, a large mirror standing on the floor leaning against a wall like some faux Palais de Versailles evocation, and a very small "second bedroom" that was essentially big enough for a double bed and nothing else. Oh - and no dressers in either of the bedrooms. And one small closet. We expressed interest after seeing it anyhow because, hey, we could make it work (and drape a big blanket over that couch to protect it) but they decided they didn't want us.

Hubby was crushed and proclaimed the meeting "a disaster". The kids were in tow that day and full of beans but hey, those are my kids and that's what they will be like. They weren't obnoxious (or maybe they were and I'm just immune) but the couple renting the place was young, no kids and would be living upstairs so clearly not ideal.

So today we saw another place. Cheaper rent, just as good location, but a very elderly cat to look after. 21 yrs old. Rickety. The apartment owner has been renting out for summers in the past and keeps warning people that "the cat might not make it". I'm not even sure the cat will make it to July.

This other place is very modern - renovated loft / Ikea / stainless steel / industrial sort of modern. Again, not perfect - but at least the couch isn't white! So we'll confirm our interest and see where it goes. Fingers crossed for us.

The kids were not in tow for this one, so we think our chances are better.

In other news...

I notice that Hubby has been sneaking the Irene's all-natural cinnamon rugelach bits out through the side of the package rather than opening it up entirely, keeping the sticky paper in place. They were on sale at Whole Foods - half-price. So of course I bought two packages. Maybe Hubby thinks that we won't notice the sneaking and disappearing bits? Except that the package is transparent...

Finally, this acrostic poem from a classmate of Kid#2 makes us laugh each time we recite it - which we do frequently. So I reprint it here, without permission from the original author, in honour of the upcoming snow flurries, signifying (I hope) winter's last blast.

Snow is falling.
No grass.
Oh my god!
Where's the grass?!

So kind, so generous, so manipulative...

Overheard tonight at bath time:

Kid#2: But I really want the Lego Taj Mahal for my birthday.

Dad: The Taj Mahal? What age level is that for?

Kid#2: 16 years old.

Dad: You want a Lego set that's for 16 year olds? Kids that age are driving cars!

Kid#2: That's ok Daddy. I'll let you help me with it.

Prize for the new word of the day goes to...

Neologisms are big around here.

Kid#2 exits the car with his water bottle and looks at all of the puddles on the driveway, determined to pour his drinking water into a puddle (because he just seems wired for that sort of thing...) and so he says, "I wonder which puddle most needs biggering..."

Um. Yeah.

Judging a book by its cover

Last week was the book fair at school. I sent the boys to school with cash and they came home with books.

Kid#1 came home with the usual suspects - Diary of a Wimpy Kid and things like that.

Kid#2 came home with this book. I suspect ulterior motives...

Kid#1 and his special favour

One thing I didn't mention is that when hubby told the kids they would be going downhill skiing today, Kid#1 cried because it meant he would miss the "science fair" at school.

Let me clarify two things - this isn't a "science fair" where all of the kids are presenting science projects as part of the curriculum. This is, as far as I can tell, an entirely parent- / volunteer-run activity where students can go if they wish and put raffle tickets in science baskets (with items donated by the parents) and buy pizza slices and see things about science. So it isn't technically part of school. And it's on a Saturday over lunch time 11-2.

And the other thing is, Kid#1 had never never never never never mentioned that he wanted to go, despite knowing about this for oh - about two weeks ahead of time.

So we were shocked.

And we believed that he should go skiing anyhow. Even, as he said, "But I've already been downhill skiing this winter and I haven't  been to the science fair!" Well you can't fault his logic.

All this explains why, today on my day off from kids, I will be heading to the school science fair. With a camera. I am under strict orders to take pictures of everything and share them with the family when they come back.

Well actually I offered as a way to stop the tears and encourage the kid to head to Vermont instead of staying home with me - I figured it was the lesser of two so-called evils.

So here I go - off to a science fair with camera in hand. I feel all National Enquirer paparazzi reporter-like. Wonder if I'll see space aliens? And I sure do hope we don't win any of those science-packed baskets, because I'm also under orders to buy a raffle ticket for each and every one. Actually, I was asked to put in 5 tickets for each one, but I negotiated down because I'm good like that...

A day to oneself

Hubby has taken the boys to Vermont for one last downhill skiing expedition. This will mark their fourth time (!!!) downhill skiing this winter. They all love it.

I don't care for downhill skiing at all. I took lessons when I was in my early 20s because, as a French teacher, it seemed to me that all French teachers knew how to downhill ski. The reason is very practical - we take our students to Quebec for a ski trip. This accomplishes two things: 1. it immerses the kids in French and 2. it makes learning French seem cool, therefore boosting French enrollment and keeping French teachers employed. Most teenagers are smarter than that.

However, I was never very good at downhill skiing and, as it turns out, never very good at taking a bunch of teenagers to  Quebec to go downhill skiing. Seems that the thing with me is that I like my sleep and I like my solitude - neither of which I got while chaperoning a downhill ski trip for a bunch of teenagers. And I didn't get it while chaperoning band trips or international trips to Europe either. It is probably mostly for this reason that I got out of teaching.

But I am enjoying my solitude in the house right now, while my boys are away playing. This has actually been a sort of dream of mine - that hubby can take the boys for adventures and I can stay at home. My little dream come true. Until tomorrow evening. But I'll take it!

Playdates - when one is and one isn't

Kid#1 has his first playdate of our year in Boston - a FRIEND (and Kid#1 hasn't been allowing the use of that word until now) came over for this afternoon. For the first time in the seven months we have been here. What a relief! Except now it opens up a whole new can of worms - what does Kid#2 do while Kid#1 is playing with his FRIEND? They seem to mostly be figuring it out, and there aren't too many tears - so far. But it's probably only a matter of time...

On the other hand, Kid#1 has the good grace to laugh at himself about now using the dreaded F-word : FRIEND!!!

Hubby's bday

So today was hubby's bday and Kid#1 was in fine form (said as sarcastically as possible). Right now he is moaning and complaining that he's too tired for a bath, but I bet his energy will pick right up as soon as it's story time. Odd how that happens.

Events of the day: last cross-country ski of the season (which was also my first one, but I digress), Farmer's Breakfast at Drumlin Farm (with way too many pancakes!!!), wandering around Drumlin Farm after for a very long time, including a hike up Drumlin Hill. Then back home to change and off to Nahant for dinner at Tides - wish we'd been able to get a window seat but we'll go back again and enjoy the view another time. Kid#1 seemed to hold it together for most of the day until now. He's definitely the ruler of over-acting in a big bad way. He may  not live to be 10 at this rate.

Oddly, the worse behaved Kid#1 gets, the better behaved Kid#2 gets, and then Kid#1 complains that we like his younger brother better than him. Um... yeah? Tell me - why a kid who is smart enough to understand advanced physics concepts and how to count in binary doesn't get that he is causing his own problems with his own bad behavioural choices? Maybe when he's 30, he'll get it... maybe...

update on the blog that no one reads

I never found a job in Boston. Boys are doing well at school (report cards come home next week so we'll see if the teachers agree). Hubby is loving his work at Harvard, but especially the prof he is working with - they are both big kids who love the outdoors.

We've had my parents come and visit twice. A couple of other friends have promised they would come down.

Last night Kid#1 had a bleeding nose in the middle of the night. The night before that was nightmares. Tonight he switches to the top bunk (the boys rotate every 10 nights or so) and that usually puts a stop to these sorts of things.

Kid#2 lost his first baby tooth recently and was thrilled that the tooth fairy came - even in the US.

That's about it for now!