Uncle John

Received word today that my dad's brother John died quite suddenly. A good friend who visits him daily was unable to reach him by phone and went around to the house and discovered his body on the floor, quite at peace. Although John had lung problems for years, it does not seem to have been a respiratory attack that took him - probably something much more sudden and painless, thankfully.

I wish I could regale you all with stories, but the truth is that I hadn't seen him in over a decade and my childhood memories of him are quite faded. He was tall and highly intelligent. Apparently he had quite a knack for foreign languages and, from his Facebook postings, enjoyed playing with the English language. I never quite understood his sense of humour, but I know it was sparkling and witty. Any inability to 'get it' lies entirely with me.

John also had his share of difficulties in life.  A first marriage ended in divorce and family (two daughters) who eventually relocated across the country. A second marriage brought two sons who died in a plane crash (the older son was piloting and the younger one went along for the ride) and his second wife died as well. John lived alone, but he was not lonely. He had a rich social life and my dad says that sometimes it was hard to reach him on the phone, because he was out with friends or participating in some activity.

I talked at some length with my dad this evening and he's doing well and will be travelling to help with arrangements and be at the funeral. When I announced the death to my boys, who had never met my Uncle John, my youngest got quite sad and said "I never met him, and now I never will" - clearly quite attached to this relative he never knew. My oldest was a little more philosophical and cerebral, commenting about how there are many family members that we never meet, and how, in fact, we never meet most of our family.

Both got extra special long hugs today as a special request from their Grandpa.

I wish the same for everyone out there. Extra special long hugs to and from those you love.

The $80 dessert

Yesterday we embarked on one of Hubby's adventures. Hubby occasionally gets these ideas like, "Oh let's go for a little hike" and 5 miles and 5,000 feet up later, you realize that you have different definitions of "little". Or Hubby will say, "Let's do a family dinner at this great restaurant that's one of Boston's best!" and you get there and realize it's a seafood restaurant - like a serious one - where you don't recognize anything on the menu and they have no kids' menu and so your kids (who are, after all, part of the family) are grumpy because there is no pizza or pasta and you realize that you have a different definition of "great".

Can you tell where this is going?

For months, since moving to Boston, Hubby has had this idea that we should do a nice family dinner or something at Top of the Hub restaurant.

Top of the Hub is at the top of the Prudential Building, 52 floors up. It has a lovely view of Boston and area, and the boys and I visited the building back in the late summer. We went to the observation level on the 50th floor and paid for the privilege. We spent an hour or so there viewing (Kid#2 especially likes being in high places and looking down on others... hmm....) but Hubby was not with us as he was working. So I think he's had Prudential Building envy.

We have also been using Top of the Hub as a sort of bribe to get the kids to exhibit better manners at home. If they show good "Top of the Hub" manners, like using a fork for salad, sitting through the whole meal, saying please and thank you, and not dipping their fingers in the milk, then we would go to the Top of the Hub. Lately, the boys have been accusing us of lying - that we would never go to Top of the Hub.

So this weekend, we went. For dessert. We had lunch at home and then went out to the Mapparium (which was extremely cool!) and then dessert at Top of the Hub. I insisted that we check the online menu first to see if there were even desserts that our kids would want to order. Yes, I have picky kids. In France, we took them into a patisserie and offered them "anything they wanted". Kid#2 picked a plain butter croissant and Kid#1 couldn't find anything he liked until he saw the American-style chocolate chip cookies. Sigh...

But I digress.

Kid#1 had a minor freak-out as soon as we sat down because the place was "too grown-uppy". Kid#2 was on good behaviour because hey, if his brother was going to try and wreck things by being bad, then Kid#2 was going to be downright angelic. The kids both had a "wazzup" moment with the dessert menu though (which was buried in the middle of the cocktails menu, which was a whole other discussion....). They both settled on the fresh-baked cookie platter - 12 cookies fresh out of the oven. We ascertained that we could substitute the peanut butter cookies for something else (really? a restaurant that still makes peanut butter cookies and the waitress wasn't sure if we could swap them out?)  Hubby went into over-spoiling mode by declaring that each child could have his own platter. (!!!!!)

Hubby and I each had a chocolate molten lava cake with blackberry ice cream. Photos are on my Facebook page (in case you are interested).

Well four gingerales (no free refills), one coffee and four extraordinary desserts later, with tax and tip, the total was just over $80. Adventure indeed.

On the other hand, the boys have left-over cookies for the entire week's worth of school lunches. On the other other hand, Kid#1 complained about a stuffed tummy for the rest of the evening and Kid#2 is at home today with a hurting tummy that he suspects is from "too much melty chocolate in the cookies". Sigh.

Next time, we'll go without the kids and spend the money on the sitter. And I don't think our "Top of the Hub" bribe will be at all effective henceforth. I do have to wonder what Hubby's next adventure proposal will be...

Games in the playground

As the weather has been getting nicer, on the two days each week when I pick the boys up directly after school. we have been spending more time in the playground instead of rushing straight home. Typically, the discussion has gone something like this:

Me: Shall we play outside a bit or head home?
Kid#1: Home!
Kid#2: Play!

When we have let Kid#1 prevail and headed straight home, he proclaims himself to be bored within minutes and is a real rascal by the end of the evening. So I've stopped asking and I just tell them to go and run around. Kid#1 still proclaims that there is nothing to do, but he finds someone to play with after a few minutes, or plays "off the wall" with other boys and the endless stream of tennis balls that he collects in his backpack.

The kids don't really need me around except as a backpack overseer so I also get to watch how the other kids play.

The other day, I noticed a boy crouched on the ground with his hands up to his eyes. Another boy was next to him with his hands over his ears. I was worried that someone was hurt or they had collided and I was about to go over when I noticed that there was also a girl in front of them singing and dancing. Then I realized - they were playing MTV! The one boy was the camera man and the other was the sound guy and the girl was some superstar, playing it up for her virtual audience.

We've come a long way from cops and robbers...

Saturday morning

Sun streaming in. Breakfast dishes cleaned. Boys playing Lego. Me on the computer. Hubby doing his own thing. Hot tea. This is just about ideal....

Time to go shake things up and blow a snotty kid's nose...

Rites of childhood

Today was another milestone marker - Kid#2 is riding a two-wheeler for the first time! No training wheels! On the other hand, he's now exhausted and screaming a lot. I'll remember his two-wheeling riding instead.

So after school, I picked up the boys and we (they) played for a while in the school playground. It's actually city land, with a big play-yard, but the school kids have use of it during the day for lunch hour and so on. Great facility. Kid#1 proclaimed himself to be bored and wanted to bike. I guess there were probably kids around there biking. So home we go and drag out the bikes. I mean, literally drag them up from the basement where they've spent the winter.

It is clear - very clear - that Kid#2 has grown way too tall for his little yellow bike with the training wheels. The next size up (which we brought with us from Kingston, just in case) doesn't have training wheels. So I ask, "Are you ready for riding a bike without training wheels?" I mean, the kid is almost 7. Of course he's ready. And he's an eternal optimist, so I bring up the new green bike without the training wheels.

Tire pressure seemed ok (like I know about these things) so off we head to the school yard - again. Streets, as you can imagine, are a little dangerous for newbies on these bike thingies, but the school yard has a very large, conveniently flat area that is for a splash pad and kick ball and a few other things - so we head there.

Kid#1, like a cycling pro, races off around the school, asks for a trick bike, and bikes fast off any sort of jump-like thing he can find - curbs, retaining walls, random piles of dirt.

Kid#2 alternates between "I will NEVER be able to do this" to "Hey, look at me! I'm biking!!!" and eventually gets the hang of it quite well - keeping his balance (mostly) and looking ahead at where he's going instead of looking down at his miraculously pedaling feet (mostly).

Only two problems with Kid#2's style.

1. He can't seem to go in a straight line.
2. He doesn't use the brakes.

Apart from that, he's great!

Heading home, we see Daddy biking back from work and he's pretty impressed with Kid#2's progress. Later, Hubby says to me, "You're a good mom".

Yeah. Sometimes I am.

Update

Email back from modern apt owner - he has agreed to rent to us. Break out the champagne! But quietly... At least we won't be homeless for July. Or camping for the entire month. Or sleeping in our tiny subcompact car. All of which were possibilities of varying degrees...

In other news, I finally realized that comments were set to "moderated" on this blog (duh) and so I looked at them and approved a couple. I also realized that *anyone* could comment, even if they were "anonymous". Well anonymous comments sort of freak me out (especially when they're short and vague, like these ones were) so I deleted them and changed the settings so you can't post anonymous comments anymore. Begone spambots and cybercrawlers! And anonymous whoever you are.

Why would someone put a white couch in a rental unit?

We are only renting our current place until June 30. However Hubby's agreement with Harvard is he will be there until July 31. Also, our place back home is rented out until July 31. This raises the small problem of where we will live for the month of July. Even though Hubby keeps reminding me that "we have a tent", I'm not too keen on that option so I've been pushing for a real apartment to rent for July.

We saw one a couple of days ago that was ok but not entirely suitable. The place said it was good for kids, but they had a white couch, a large mirror standing on the floor leaning against a wall like some faux Palais de Versailles evocation, and a very small "second bedroom" that was essentially big enough for a double bed and nothing else. Oh - and no dressers in either of the bedrooms. And one small closet. We expressed interest after seeing it anyhow because, hey, we could make it work (and drape a big blanket over that couch to protect it) but they decided they didn't want us.

Hubby was crushed and proclaimed the meeting "a disaster". The kids were in tow that day and full of beans but hey, those are my kids and that's what they will be like. They weren't obnoxious (or maybe they were and I'm just immune) but the couple renting the place was young, no kids and would be living upstairs so clearly not ideal.

So today we saw another place. Cheaper rent, just as good location, but a very elderly cat to look after. 21 yrs old. Rickety. The apartment owner has been renting out for summers in the past and keeps warning people that "the cat might not make it". I'm not even sure the cat will make it to July.

This other place is very modern - renovated loft / Ikea / stainless steel / industrial sort of modern. Again, not perfect - but at least the couch isn't white! So we'll confirm our interest and see where it goes. Fingers crossed for us.

The kids were not in tow for this one, so we think our chances are better.

In other news...

I notice that Hubby has been sneaking the Irene's all-natural cinnamon rugelach bits out through the side of the package rather than opening it up entirely, keeping the sticky paper in place. They were on sale at Whole Foods - half-price. So of course I bought two packages. Maybe Hubby thinks that we won't notice the sneaking and disappearing bits? Except that the package is transparent...

Finally, this acrostic poem from a classmate of Kid#2 makes us laugh each time we recite it - which we do frequently. So I reprint it here, without permission from the original author, in honour of the upcoming snow flurries, signifying (I hope) winter's last blast.

Snow is falling.
No grass.
Oh my god!
Where's the grass?!

So kind, so generous, so manipulative...

Overheard tonight at bath time:

Kid#2: But I really want the Lego Taj Mahal for my birthday.

Dad: The Taj Mahal? What age level is that for?

Kid#2: 16 years old.

Dad: You want a Lego set that's for 16 year olds? Kids that age are driving cars!

Kid#2: That's ok Daddy. I'll let you help me with it.

Prize for the new word of the day goes to...

Neologisms are big around here.

Kid#2 exits the car with his water bottle and looks at all of the puddles on the driveway, determined to pour his drinking water into a puddle (because he just seems wired for that sort of thing...) and so he says, "I wonder which puddle most needs biggering..."

Um. Yeah.

Judging a book by its cover

Last week was the book fair at school. I sent the boys to school with cash and they came home with books.

Kid#1 came home with the usual suspects - Diary of a Wimpy Kid and things like that.

Kid#2 came home with this book. I suspect ulterior motives...

Kid#1 and his special favour

One thing I didn't mention is that when hubby told the kids they would be going downhill skiing today, Kid#1 cried because it meant he would miss the "science fair" at school.

Let me clarify two things - this isn't a "science fair" where all of the kids are presenting science projects as part of the curriculum. This is, as far as I can tell, an entirely parent- / volunteer-run activity where students can go if they wish and put raffle tickets in science baskets (with items donated by the parents) and buy pizza slices and see things about science. So it isn't technically part of school. And it's on a Saturday over lunch time 11-2.

And the other thing is, Kid#1 had never never never never never mentioned that he wanted to go, despite knowing about this for oh - about two weeks ahead of time.

So we were shocked.

And we believed that he should go skiing anyhow. Even, as he said, "But I've already been downhill skiing this winter and I haven't  been to the science fair!" Well you can't fault his logic.

All this explains why, today on my day off from kids, I will be heading to the school science fair. With a camera. I am under strict orders to take pictures of everything and share them with the family when they come back.

Well actually I offered as a way to stop the tears and encourage the kid to head to Vermont instead of staying home with me - I figured it was the lesser of two so-called evils.

So here I go - off to a science fair with camera in hand. I feel all National Enquirer paparazzi reporter-like. Wonder if I'll see space aliens? And I sure do hope we don't win any of those science-packed baskets, because I'm also under orders to buy a raffle ticket for each and every one. Actually, I was asked to put in 5 tickets for each one, but I negotiated down because I'm good like that...

A day to oneself

Hubby has taken the boys to Vermont for one last downhill skiing expedition. This will mark their fourth time (!!!) downhill skiing this winter. They all love it.

I don't care for downhill skiing at all. I took lessons when I was in my early 20s because, as a French teacher, it seemed to me that all French teachers knew how to downhill ski. The reason is very practical - we take our students to Quebec for a ski trip. This accomplishes two things: 1. it immerses the kids in French and 2. it makes learning French seem cool, therefore boosting French enrollment and keeping French teachers employed. Most teenagers are smarter than that.

However, I was never very good at downhill skiing and, as it turns out, never very good at taking a bunch of teenagers to  Quebec to go downhill skiing. Seems that the thing with me is that I like my sleep and I like my solitude - neither of which I got while chaperoning a downhill ski trip for a bunch of teenagers. And I didn't get it while chaperoning band trips or international trips to Europe either. It is probably mostly for this reason that I got out of teaching.

But I am enjoying my solitude in the house right now, while my boys are away playing. This has actually been a sort of dream of mine - that hubby can take the boys for adventures and I can stay at home. My little dream come true. Until tomorrow evening. But I'll take it!

Playdates - when one is and one isn't

Kid#1 has his first playdate of our year in Boston - a FRIEND (and Kid#1 hasn't been allowing the use of that word until now) came over for this afternoon. For the first time in the seven months we have been here. What a relief! Except now it opens up a whole new can of worms - what does Kid#2 do while Kid#1 is playing with his FRIEND? They seem to mostly be figuring it out, and there aren't too many tears - so far. But it's probably only a matter of time...

On the other hand, Kid#1 has the good grace to laugh at himself about now using the dreaded F-word : FRIEND!!!

Hubby's bday

So today was hubby's bday and Kid#1 was in fine form (said as sarcastically as possible). Right now he is moaning and complaining that he's too tired for a bath, but I bet his energy will pick right up as soon as it's story time. Odd how that happens.

Events of the day: last cross-country ski of the season (which was also my first one, but I digress), Farmer's Breakfast at Drumlin Farm (with way too many pancakes!!!), wandering around Drumlin Farm after for a very long time, including a hike up Drumlin Hill. Then back home to change and off to Nahant for dinner at Tides - wish we'd been able to get a window seat but we'll go back again and enjoy the view another time. Kid#1 seemed to hold it together for most of the day until now. He's definitely the ruler of over-acting in a big bad way. He may  not live to be 10 at this rate.

Oddly, the worse behaved Kid#1 gets, the better behaved Kid#2 gets, and then Kid#1 complains that we like his younger brother better than him. Um... yeah? Tell me - why a kid who is smart enough to understand advanced physics concepts and how to count in binary doesn't get that he is causing his own problems with his own bad behavioural choices? Maybe when he's 30, he'll get it... maybe...

update on the blog that no one reads

I never found a job in Boston. Boys are doing well at school (report cards come home next week so we'll see if the teachers agree). Hubby is loving his work at Harvard, but especially the prof he is working with - they are both big kids who love the outdoors.

We've had my parents come and visit twice. A couple of other friends have promised they would come down.

Last night Kid#1 had a bleeding nose in the middle of the night. The night before that was nightmares. Tonight he switches to the top bunk (the boys rotate every 10 nights or so) and that usually puts a stop to these sorts of things.

Kid#2 lost his first baby tooth recently and was thrilled that the tooth fairy came - even in the US.

That's about it for now!